Monday, September 6, 2010

Sister To Sister

So like everything else in my life, this perfectly aligns to fit in with the foolishness I'm going through. I talked earlier about me meeting with a teenage girl that has a daughter. When I meet with kids for the first time, I always give them my phone number (my stepmother, a teacher, swears that I will eventually tire of this practice) and tell them to call me if they need to talk. I don't normally mind it. Anyway, my teen mom hit me today and said she needed to talk. I stepped outside and prepared to help her with whatever she needed.

She started by talking about her daughter's father, who is now dating a former friend of hers. She said that the guy and his chick routinely call and threaten her and she doesn't know what to do. She said that they call her with stupidity and she is tired of the mess. *Sigh* While I hate it that my kids go through these kind of problems, I love being a big sister of sorts and helping my kids out. I'm not an angel and I've done my share of dirt. But time and reflection have given me the chance to look back on my life and know what I did wrong, and where I fucked up. I started by asking her if she still sleeps with him. She sheepishly admitted she does. I told her to stop immediately. I told her that it doesn't matter if she needs to masturbate or just take cold showers, I told her that she needed to get far away from him. I told her that if a man really loved her, he wouldn't get off on letting his new chick harass her. I told her that Pookie would NEVER let me call his ex-wife and harass her, because only a man that truly cares about both parties wouldn't let either of them go back and forth (yet another reason why I love my man). I told her to get her shit in order and watch him begging and pleading for her once she did.

And then I had to break down the mentality of the other chick for her. I told her that she must be doing something right in her life for the new chick to call and text her continuously. I let my "lil' sis" know straight up that if she really had dude's heart, that chick wouldn't be thinking about her because she'd be content in her own life and relationship. Like always, I used my own life to illustrate the points I was making. I told my friend how twisted it is that my ex-boyfriend's baby mama is so insecure that after all these years, she's still hitting me up. I told her how crazy it is that someone is so bored with their life that all they have time to do is to email and text me and my family and friends. I told my lil' homie that if she really wanted to get under dude's skin, she should totally forget about him. I told her that when she drops off her kid, not to say a word. Don't ask him how is day is, and don't offer to tell him how her day is. If he asks her in for lemonade or to get down, she should say no, because she's got a man waiting to take her out. I told her to go to school, get her own spot, get a job and watch his mouth hang open as dudes that are worth something start to take notice and take her out.

By the end of our conversation, my lil' homie felt a lot better, I could hear it in her voice. It's like I'm a paid big sister. How cool is that?

1 comment:

Ray Ray said...

thats EXACTLY why i'm goin to school for psych..i wanna be able to help young women feel better like's too bad that i cant do it WHILE i'm in school..that'd be awesome. i think youre doing a great job