Thursday, November 13, 2008

adventures in dating- another one bites the dust

i got a myspace message recently from a guy i'd never met. now due to that crazy hiefer's tendancy to act like other people and try to be my friend (i'm telling yall, that bitch chloe c. has no fucking life) i was rather apprehensive as to whether i should talk to him or not. he said that he stumbled upon my page and he thought i was pretty (flattery will get you everywhere!) and he gave me his number to call him. i thought about erasing the message, but i figured, what the hell, i'll try him.
on a day that i wasn't busy, i sent him a text saying that i'm malika and asking if he was busy. he replied later that he wasn't and we texted a few times back and forth. the first thing i noticed in the text he sent back was that he was referring to me as "baby" (strike 1) and despite me not being cool with it, i let it slide. we eventually got on the phone with one another. within the call i told him the same thing i tell all guys that are interested. i've got a son, live with my son's father, he and i aren't serious, and before i enter a relationship with anyone i want to be financially independent. somehow the conversation went to a strange place. he seemed so nice. he was educated, he even started his own book club. i told him about my internet being down and how its hurting me finishing out this semester of school and how hard it is to work on a project at a computer lab with the baby running around. the guy told me that i'm welcome to come to his house WITH MY SON to use his computer. *huh?* not gonna happen. so then as i once again talked about my desire to be financially independent he seemed to get a tad offended. i explained to him that its nothing personal, i simply don't want to depend on a man financially and then one day he comes home, tells me he's leaving, and my son and i are out on the streets. as thankful as i am that deen pays the bills, i keep it in mind that he could switch up on me any day. i think that most women should be ready for the worst. i would think that a man would be clicking his heels up to see that a woman desires to be able to take care of herself and her child, rather than depending SOLELY on him. not this guy. he said that is why trust is so important. i explained to him that jesus christ himself could come to me and say that he'll pay all of my bills and i wouldn't have to worry, and i'd say "no offense jesus, but i need to be able to pay my own bills first before i roll with you." of course, not being a christian makes it a bit easier for me to decline an invitation from jesus, but that's neither here nor there. anyway, he goes off into saying that he wants me to stay the night. i told him that i'm not having sex with ANYONE any time soon. he said he wants to know what its like to wake up holding me. now this wouldn't be nearly as weird if this weren't our FIRST phone conversation. as it truly dawns on me that this guy aren't on the same plain, in the same book, on the same planet, in the same solar system, in the same fucking galaxy. he just didn't get it. needless to say, strike 2. that's right, all of this foolishness, and the guy still has a little rope left to hang himself.
we'd been on the phone for an hour (its safe to say that i'm a glutton for punishment) and i had to get ready for work. i told him that i'd call him when i got home. well, once i got home, deen and caleb and i ended up watching t.v. and doing a family moment so i didn't call him. i had every intention of calling him back, that just wasn't the moment for me to do so. at 8:30 the next goddamned morning, dude texted me to ask if i was busy. do i seem like a morning person to ANY of you?! didn't think so. i happened to be up because i had just dropped deen off at work and i was on my way somewhere to go work on my project. i simply replied with a text that said "yes, i'm doing homework" and he replied with a text that said "yeah, sure whatever. just call me when you're not too busy." and there, ladies and gentlemen, we have strike 3.
first off, family, school and business comes before ANY dude right now. that's real talk. second of all don't EVER call or text me that early in the damned morning unless someone is dead or pregnant. and third, no, i won't call you all of the damned time. period. its nothing personal, i just have a lot of shit going on to where i don't wait by the damned phone to talk all of the damned time. i've got a clique of homegirls that i've had since high school and i'd take a bullet for those chicks and i don't even talk to them everyday. its because they have lives too. he really seemed like a nice guy. he's even texted me a few times since then, i just have no desire to talk to him. i just couldn't deal with someone that wanted to be under me 24/7. oh well, back to the drawing board.


Just Jasmine said...

good to see you back, i've been bored--well not really but your absence was felt.

watch out for dudes like that....Crazy- Deranged. Wifing you up after one conversation.

I agree with you about being financially independent. I'm like you, you could pull teh bait and switch and then im assed out. That would be bad enough if i were alone but with a kid thats a hell no, so i'd rather get an apartment with my man but know that if he bounces i can still pay the bills.

Neverendingchase said...

giiiiirl! aren't these cats
cra-and-zay! i hate when dude call me- boo, miss lady, sexy, shawty..uuugggghhhhhh...i hate that! especially if i don't know them like that. keep looking....all the good ones can't be gone.

Leo80zBaby said...

Lmao!!!I said strike three along with you as i read.That "yea whatever" is a crazy line girl.Thats that "i dont believe you im on my way to yo house to make sure you are doing what you say you doing" line.Good thing he doesnt know where you live.