Friday, April 7, 2017
My friend Tova first introduced me to the concept of twin flames. She explained it as a type of soul mate, two people that no matter what pulls them apart, they manage to always find themselves back to one another. Once Pete passed, I always thought about how instantaneous our friendship was. We met one day, had a great and oddly personal convo, followed by another great and oddly personal friendship. I'd always wondered how he just managed to find me and stop in and have awesome moments together. My question was always 'did he choose me or did we choose one another?'
Here it is, nearly a month after his death, and I'm not shamed to say that I still Google Pete. The fact is that I Googled him extensively the moment I learned his last name. I Googled him the whole time we were friends. I'd even Googled him a few days before he died and the page still shows the last time I visited it. I refuse to click on that page now though. I like the reminder that I was digging him even before his death. When someone close to you dies, its only common to go online and find all you can about them. I Googled, Yahooed, Binged, and anything else I could find. Being 47, its not surprising that there was not much about him online. That and his moments of disappearing into his addiction make sense that he'd not be online much. I checked so many sites because in my mind, Pete was a complete rock star. I combed the AJC, hoping to find something about my friend. Anything about his body being found? Nothing. I guess he just mattered to the hearts and minds of those who loved him.
I like to think that I'm the reason that he was active on Facebook a few months before he died. I knew he hadn't been on Facebook in some years, but I asked him if he had a page, so I could add him. I knew he did. He told me that he did, and that it was nothing but pics of his daughter. I knew that too. But suddenly in November (right around the time I asked him about Facebook) he got active on it again and accepted my friend request. I look at a video of him and his daughter frequently. I always feel a smile plastered across my face as I look at it.
Anyway, off that tangent, not only do I Google Pete and look at his Facebook pics and videos, last night I found myself looking at things about people that had near death experiences. What was it like and are our loved ones there waiting for us? I came across something that I found quite fascinating. Numbers 4 and 5 stuck out to me.