i've been thinking about the whole marriage thing lately. not to deen (my beloved, yet aloof live-in baby daddy) or anything, just in general. i think its so stupid when people are all "i love this person with all of my heart so i'm going to marry them, forget the fact that we're both broke, we're IN LOVE." that's the dumbest shit i've ever heard. marrying for love. what are you, stupid? i initially thought about when a woman should base her readiness to get married on. i came to these numbers:
and that's real talk. love is beautiful. but forget what you heard, love doesn't pay bills. georgia power company doesn't give a damned if a woman and her new husband make love for hours on end as long as the bill is paid. who the hell wants to be madly in love living in a card board box? if a woman is going to get married it should benefit her financially as well as emotionally. i'm not speaking as a gold digger. i'm speaking as a woman that has seen women not protect themselves monetarily so they end up supporting some broke bastard. if you get married ladies, make sure he's pulling in some loot. and if she is the bread winner, he needs to be home with the kids full time. if she's working and he isn't, there's no reason to spring for a nanny and a maid too. that's just bad business. so anyway, that brought me to what numbers a man should have in order to get married. so i decided on this:
i know the trust thing is important for women too, but dudes tend to highly overlook how much they need to trust their future wife. assuming the man is the breadwinner, he needs to know that his woman is going to run for him. i realized how much deen trusts me when he gave me $700 cash to put into his account. gave me the account number and all. needless to say, i dropped it off without a hitch and i didn't hold on to the account number, but still. there are plenty of men that work hard to provide for the household and they trust the woman to take care of the money that he brings in. as a matter of fact, i've got a homeboy that gave his girl an amex and old girl ran up a bill of $4k in a month. he hit the roof, she agreed to pay him back (she didn't) and he had to take out a loan to pay the card off. and then he married her a few months ago. i was sick to my stomach when i learned he wifed her. and now she's pregnant. i seriously told him that i give it 5 years on the marriage. i think she's a great person, don't get me wrong. but you can't trust her on that level. and she's a bad business move. when a man is getting married, he needs to know that if he goes to jail his woman is going to put money on his books and work to get him the best lawyer possible. or if the man is in a car accident and paralyzed for the rest of his life, he needs his wife to be willing to lift his ass in and out of wheelchairs for the rest of his life. and we're not even going to talk about colostomy bags. yep, the future wifey should even be willing to change the colostomy bags. if a woman isn't going to try to pay back $4k she ran up getting her hair and nails done, will she be willing to change his shit out? what do you think?
when talking to my homeboy about the numbers, he suggested that for women i change it to:
i have to agree with him on that. love and business are important, but trust is big for us also. the woman needs to know that dude isn't going to start screwing his 19-year-old secretary and stashing his money into offshore accounts, before withdrawing money from their joint account and leaving her penniless with 3 kids. cuz shit like that happens EVERY DAY. we need to follow our hearts, and get a man that's about money, but we need to know that he's not going to drop us when it benefits him to do so. so yeah, trust important also.
just remember, if you are stupid enough- i mean happy enough to decide to get married, just make sure you've dotted all your t's and crossed all your eyes. because if that person loves you with crossed eyes, you may have really found the right sucker- i mean mate. but seriously, be careful. the last thing youtube needs is another jilted ex. personally, i can't get enough of seeing people spout all the dirt on their exes, i'm just saying that youtube doesn't need anymore of them.