back story: about 8 years ago while i was a student at georgia perimeter college, i developed a huge crush on a guy. his name was marinotti. apparently many other women thought he was a cutie too because everytime i saw him, he was surrounded by women that were laughing and fawning over him. but somehow, no matter how many women were nearby, i always managed he lock eyes with him as i'd walk across campus. i asked around and i eventually learned who he was and we worked our ways into eachother's casual circles. i remember how one day we sat in the student center talking and i actually had him laughing until he was nearly crying. it was that day that i learned that he was actually a bit of a nerd. i was smitten. i eventually worked up the nerve to ask him if we could hang and he broke the news to me- he had signed up for the military and he was shipping out shortly. heartbroken, i somehow managed to move on.
i never forgot about marinotti. every now and again i would look around myspace, facebook and google to see if i could find him, but i never did.
today, while in the farmers market with deen and caleb, i walked away to grab a few items. i remember seeing some big ghetto chick in an ugly dress with ugly tats. i glanced at her and walked away. but then, i looked over and i saw a guy eyeballing me, which i really didn't sweat because let's be honest, i am a bit of a hottie and guys eyeballing me happens daily (not that i'm arrogant lol). but then i looked at him again. it was marinotti. and he had a baby carriage with him. his eyes were bloodshot and he looked high. he didn't have that same fresh babyface i remembered. he looked like he'd had a long life. and its only been 8 years.
walking through the farmer's market a bit longer and i realized that the tattooed chick in the ugly dress was there with marinotti. what. the. hell? was this seriously the same dude that had the fliest chicks at gpc hanging on his every word? i try not to think like this because even in all of my arrogance, i know that there are many women that look at me and feel the same way about deen. "he ended up with her?" damn right he did! as i walked through the farmer's market looking for deen and caleb, i thought back on marinotti. what if i'd had worked up the nerve to talk to him sooner? what if i'd made an attempt to stay in touch with him while he was in the military? those were good times a gpc. but times are different now. for all of the couldas, shouldas, and wouldas, i wouldn't change my situation for anything.
i finally found deen bouncing through an aisle as the baby sat up on his shoulders laughing at his silly father. "did you find what you were looking for?" deen asked. i hugged him, smiled, and said "i sure did."
3 comments:
I love this story and i'm really pulling for you and deen.
I always think of those sliding door/ what if moments but you can't change the past. You are where you are in life for a reason.
While I wish alot of things in my life were different, I am at peace with my life.
I have a few of those moments too but everybody makes thier own choices in life even those who made the right choices sometimes end up like Marionatti. There but by the Grace of God... Go I
Jaycee
LIVING IN THE WOULD'VE, COULD'VE, SHOULD'VE CAN DEFINITELY HOLD ONE BACK...IM GLAD YOU DIDNT DWELL ON THE PAST
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